My wife and I lost our first-born child on July 28th, 2019. His name is Louis. My wife Andrea was 22 weeks and 6 days pregnant when she unexpectedly went into preterm labour and gave birth to our son.
He put up a strong fight for about two hours, before quietly passing away in our arms. Grieving the loss of our son has been undeniably the most difficult obstacle either one of us has ever had to face, and it goes without saying that we will battle this grief forever.
Following Louis’s death, feelings of isolation, despair and hopelessness came naturally. The only way we were able to make it through that darkness was with all the love and support we received from friends, family, and especially each other.
We also discovered numerous perinatal loss communities on social media, and attended a local “bereaved parents” group that met up once a month in a library basement; they helped us feel less alone and never judged our broad spectrum of emotions that ranged from intense anger and sadness to moments of feeling “ok”. They are truly the only ones who can comprehend a loss of this magnitude.
The hardest part of this experience was coming home from the hospital without our baby cradled in our arms. It devastated us knowing we would never be able to hold him again; thankfully, we found a volunteer group in Lincoln, Nebraska called No Footprint too Small that made us a personalized, weighted teddy bear.
They were able to match the weight of the bear to Louis’s weight when he died–they even used his onesie that I mailed in, to sew him together.
We call him Louie Bear, and we are so grateful to have him. Holding our sweet Louie Bear gives us a chance to remember how our son felt in our arms and lets us continue to bond with him. On July 28, 2020, we will be celebrating his first birthday, and of course, Louie Bear will be in attendance.
Andrea and I are expecting our rainbow baby this September, a little girl, and cannot wait to tell her all about her big brother, Louis.
Thank you Richard and Andi for #Sharingmystoryofloss
We wish Louis a Happy 1st Birthday!💜
Strength💜Support💜Together💜